MothersWhoDream

One of the biggest issues for self-employed and work-at-home moms is interruptions. To get things done, avoid the true time wasters: social phone calls, telemarketers, and in-person impromptu visits. Bolt the door and leave the answering machine on. Caller I.D. allows you to monitor, in case it’s the children’s school with an emergency. Schedule a time to phone back important callers at a time when you can best serve them with your full attention.

What about when your child comes to you with a need? Whether to postpone or allow the interruption isn’t always cut and dried.

First off, let’s use age and ability to measure need. With a three-year-old in your care, you’ll have to plan on some interruptions. But even with very young children, you can begin to sow seeds that your work is important. You may hesitate to put off your child’s needs, but if you stop for every whim or fancy, you enforce a message that interruptions are always okay. Strike a happy medium that values your child, and yourself.

Encourage young children to play quietly within view of your workspace, while you put on headphones and work at the computer. Instead of putting off a need with, “In a minute,” which invariably leads to ten and twenty, thus teaching nothing about the concept of time, use phrases your children can understand. The length of a favorite television show is within a child’s grasp.

“I’ll help you in about as long as one Spong Bob show,” you might say. Pick something reasonable. Disney’s Madagascar movie might be longer than a child can wait. The idea is to arrange for short intervals of focused work.

As children grow older, their attention spans also stretch. If you’ve trained them from the toddler years that Mommy’s work is important, they will begin to respect boundaries. And you’ll have trained yourself to get right to work and use your time wisely. Setting a timer and working tornado style for short intervals is a longstanding time management tool. Using the space of a Sponge Bob episode is a variation for moms.

What about older children? As a mother of five who has worked at home for all of my parenting years, I can tell you that your children don’t need you any less. The needs change, but the amount doesn’t. I’ve learned to fit my work in around the family schedule, which means I’m often at the computer late at night. It’s what works for me—you’ll find your own pattern. My sixteen year old approached me just last night with two permission slips for high school field trips. They didn’t need just a signature. That would have been easy. These forms asked for my health insurance provider name and group number, something I didn’t have on hand. Instead of dropping everything for this necessary interruption, I did what I’ve been doing since my kids were young: putting them off. “Leave these here and I’ll do them in the morning,” I said. The trick is to follow through. Digging out that number was number one on my to-do list this morning. And because this has become a pattern, my daughter knew it would get done. I was able to continue my work last evening, and she gets what she needs. Everybody wins.

Seemingly less urgent needs might be when my young adult daughter who lives at home, works, and attends a nearby university comes and sits in my office arm chair while I work. This is a signal she needs my time, so I might ask her if she’d like to take my break with me in half an hour. Whether spur-of-the moment or events planned more in advance, appointments solve untimely interruptions, and allow you to connect. With my teen and young adult sons, I schedule occasional food dates.

From my experience as a home-based entrepreneur and mom, setting boundaries for respect teaches:

• you to make better use of focused time
• your children to respect your work
• allows everybody to feel important

Most home-based business moms choose to work from home to spend time with their kids. Especially when you’re busiest, don’t forget to schedule mom and child time—and completely remove your work hat for the kind of bonding that creates lifelong happy memories.

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